August 31, 2010

临睡前，写一篇日记。

一方面记录美好的一天，一方面想把今天的事都刻录下来！

今早上在阿姨家-Port Dickson过，睡在旁边的妈咪很早就起来了，结果全屋子救我一个最迟起来，可是电话显示只有9点而已。

其实选在国庆日回阿姨家不是因为庆祝什么，是因为二舅妈去世了，是因为洗肾过度还是什么，具体的我不清楚！

那里的天气真的有金宝那么热！不是我夸张~

送了殡后就跟家里人回东甲咯，老爸特地载了4个妹妹10点就到了！

过后下午在南洋跟那3个人喝茶咯，其他的做工的做工，懒惰的懒惰~

然后就坐了陈凯薇的车上来了 :D

很厉害下哦我?

哈哈~刚温习完跟了家义去麦当劳叔叔开的店吃宵夜，那个变态，驾车回来就不懂控制花钱了！

刚驾他车又去撞 ^^ 哈哈~他的表情是吓到很够力的咯，哈，还好没事！

*************************************************

这几天很累却很充实，感觉上国庆日就好像是普通假期。

马来西亚人爱国的热情哪里去了？

可能随着种族课题，政治因素，国家的状态渐渐地消失了吧。

一个多文化的国家，是免不了有这些问题的，可是几时可以像美国那样，CHANGE ??

算了吧，我对政治没有那种热情，90代，你们加吧劲！政治也可以出人头地的！

明天是经济学的测验了，虽然是30题，不过是我第一次那么认真的温习，

应该是经济学值得我付出吧~

女人啊女人，即使能让我遇到你?

夜晚总让人掩盖不了那歇斯底里的寂寞，感恩我还有朋友 =)

为明天加油，你会更好，晚安！

August 30, 2010

大清早起来，

学校的宿舍少了很多Piang piang的关门声！

当然了咯，连续4天的假期，谁不要啊？

刚上完课了，经济学老师给了份功课，我很兴奋！

现在是12。48分。

多下子我就要长途跋涉去P.D了~

其实坐车去的话是很快的，算了吧，我没交通！

非得去坐那个公交，

讨厌死人的KTM，巴士~

恨啊~~~~~~~~~~~~~

这礼拜呢，我去Clubbing了~算是达到了这礼拜我的目标~

我特喜欢的金属音乐，熟悉的Deejay...

是我爱上这地方的原因！

就到这里了，去到P.D不知道能不能上网。

不行的话就读书吧 =)我带了Eco的Notes!!

August 23, 2010

如果还有明天，你该怎样装扮你的脸。

如果没有明天，要怎么说再见?

-------------------------------------------

看过星光或者是超喜欢阿信的人来说，这首歌不陌生吧！

《如果还有明天》

最近周遭我看到的生，死。

生老病死，有人说过，每个人都逃不过这4个阶段，

可是有些人就偏偏跨越了老与病，生了就死！

有谁会从刚出世后又死去的婴孩中得到些领悟?

往往人就是这样，明明知道了什么不能做却去做，为什么?

珍惜，这个词很重要！

一出生我们就应该背负着这个词，

从生我们出来的妈咪，

到抚养我们的父母，

到教育我们的老师，

你遇到的贵人，

你遇到的朋友，

你遇到的种种事！

最近越来越珍惜一天的时间了，

可能是我听到最近有个砂益人意外死去的消息吧。

他也没预料到说，他会这样去了不是?

所以如果在生前没好好地孝顺父母，好好的活着，好好地朝自己的梦想迈进！

那死后又多遗憾??

换做是我，我真的不甘心，因为在这世上，我目前做了的，我还不满足！

我时常都给自己更新说有什么新的目标！

你呢??

你有目标吗??那个支撑着你活到今天的原因！想想吧=)

珍惜，感恩。

August 19, 2010 Marriage(forward)

MARRIAGE 

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. 

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. 

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? 

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! 

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. 

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now. 

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. 

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again. 

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. 

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. 

She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request. 

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. 

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside 

the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office. 

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. 

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. 

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. 

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. 

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. 

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day. 

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. 

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore. 

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. 

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. 

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart. 

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. 

My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband.... 

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! 

By Stephanie Halmilton

August 16, 2010

Desperado...Why dont you come to your senses?

很无奈很无奈~

明明想安慰想安抚，却只可以给予一通信息，只可以那样。

只想说，我们都加油。

路是人走的，方向感很重要！

别问人家可以给你什么，问问自己可以给些人家什么 ?

同一首歌，为什么周杰伦唱就很低沉，张宇唱就很旧。

因为他们都不一样啊，谁不会永远都是那个谁！

加油吧~

p/s : 没有特别指定谁！觉得有用就拿去用！

August 13, 2010

学姐转学去美国了，现在在纽约市。

唉~~也够快的！

想起林教授在我第一个学期不断地骂，不断地教导我们！

在听了形形色色的答案后，我做出了结论：美国不是普通的亚洲人去的地方~

哈哈。

我怎么那么说？

他们说美国多恐怖啦~吃的选择不多啦~噼里啪啦的一大堆~

我觉得主要是自己本身的问题，只要你可以克服，那你去到哪里，语言文化不是问题！

想起我以前在班上把美国黑人，就是美国总统的那个种族叫做Negro!

结果换来教授在班上大大声的指责，原来如果你在美国用Negro来称呼黑人的话~就是等于你在马来西亚称呼马来人做‘马来猪’这样子啦=。=严重的话，被打死咯~哈哈

突然有点怀念那种心惊胆跳的日子，随时担心自己的杰作会被拿来批评~

那3个月后的今天，真的没有人挑剔我的英文了，我甚至觉得说，英文不再重要！

是时候随时提醒自己，英文对我很重要！INTI ? 一个学费算是马来西亚私立大学比较昂贵的学府里，竟然还出现这种问题！现在你知道，为什么教育在马来西亚，是那么的让人吐口水！

恨铁不成钢，事实上，我还是很爱这个国家！

在它不好的一面，其实蕴藏着许多很道地很大马的东西~

比如说，嘛嘛档文化啦~等等之类的！

今天趁着空挡去了图书馆翻了翻经济学的书（其实我对他很有兴趣^^）

其中提及了911， 在你知道了客机把双子塔给炸掉了的时候，你第一直觉就认定了说：诶！这下死了咯，一定很多人死了！

经济学则是把这个影响视为好的，为什么?因为它可以带动经济的发展！

建筑物不被炸掉，哪里需要重起?不重起那里有工作?

诶~诶~有点塞翁失马的感觉对不对?

最近我好像都很文学~糟糕了糟糕了~不行这样！

其实最近还在学校下载了些National Geographic 的影片来看，

我在看了杜拜塔的建筑过程后，我才知道，那多不容易，纵然全世界没多少人知道，为什么那个塔张那个样子=)

原来一个人静静地吸收这些，其实也蛮有趣的！

想跟我借来看的朋友跟我说声吧~好东西是要分享的！

晚安啦~* =)

August 10, 2010

是这样的啦。

他们要结婚了~* =)

那个很土很神经的隔壁桌同学老林 & 那个神经神经说话很厉害顶嘴的by 2老余!!(其实不像 >.<)

谁第一个想法不是--诶?几岁哦?

拜托，抛开你们那个保守式，置身世外的想法~

有谁会预料到会有海啸?难道就可以怪气象局?

有谁知道五角大厦会被炸掉?难道机舱人员没有尽责吗?

很多人习惯面对事情的方式，就是责怪，责备，尽量的把事情推得一干二净！

然后摊开来说：不关我事~~~~很轻松?!

继续继续啊***

其实有注意我的blog的朋友，

是可以发现说之前我的那篇文章是在指向这个事情~

因为当时，老林没跟我们这班兄弟正式宣布嘛~

那天，msn是爆满的咯！

1x个人在那里上线等着全部到齐然后等着他一一的解答~

问了很多啊，有儿童不宜的，有比较兴奋地，有很开心的！

他4个多月了啦~很健康~很健康~

看到了没有~其实我看不是很懂啦 XD

医生解释的时候，我都不在=)

这个男的，以后应该很调皮的说，

那些人像没有做过干爹这样，

我让你们咯，我不跟你们争了！

这孩子是你们俩的结晶，那么多人疼，他很幸运，托你们的福，不是?

这之后或许会有很多很多的挑战！

我知道鸿晓得该怎么做的了，他总是那么的懂事。

经历这次，我真的领悟到些许了，一个生命来的不易！

尤其是徘徊在那个忧郁复杂的情况下，感恩！这孩子还在！

你们多少人做到?? 问问自己！

还有1个多月的时间，要变成人家的老公，老婆了！

你们彼此要加油~*

鸿，兄弟除了加油以外没什么说的了！你懂我要表达什么就行了=)

心，说我们不熟又不行...你啊，加油啊！世俗眼光?什么屁~做好自己的本分就行了~*花无百日红，记得这句话。^^

祝福~*

August 6, 2010

今天起得好早~

6.30！

平时闹钟响了我会把它关掉然后再继续睡 ^^"

今天也不知道怎么了，

谁影响了我的情绪，什么东西影响了我的情绪！

很精神的起身，家里居然只剩刚要出门买菜的阿麽~

哈哈，结果，6.30，家里就没人了！

奇迹奇迹~~~~

一大早跟旺吃了早餐，宜来看我一面就走了（真的是一面）！

摸摸下，10点了=。=“！

刚看了个很有趣的2个片段，

是补习老师po上来的，是个佛教的前辈讲的，真的满有意义的！

你们可以点击这里查看

第一个片段~>点击<

第二个片段>点击<

面对问题的，希望你们看了这个片段，可以领悟到一些吧。

那天跟淑芬聊天，聊到智慧跟知识。

知识，你可以通过书本，朋友来获得。
智慧，只有亲身经历，领悟而来！

做个有智慧的人?还是个只是有知识的人?

August 2, 2010

嗯...

抱歉既开心却又有点复杂的心情写这篇心情记录！

以前你总爱强调很多事情'无法预料' 我还不是很相信的说~

不过呢，兄弟，透过你，我完全相信了 XD

你是不是很感慨说，人算不如天算?

其实知道了的时候，我替你开心，真的。

毕竟那是相爱相恋相处最终的家。

不过另一方面，我也在为你担心，不过我还是相信你可以应付来的！

哈哈，时间也够快了的，都听说你们在一起N年了，

以前我们经常说，看起来xxx 未必是 xxx

现在?应验了吧~你也该加油了！

一个人兼那么多职不容易，加油！扮演好你的角色!

当天，我们会为你加油的！

当然，我们这班朋友也算厉害了=。=“

很多个第一，当然，这项第一你来拿！

最后，祝福你们~* =)

献上兄弟我的祝福..

=)

August 1, 2010

清早被老爸的叫声叫醒！

我事多不愿意起身的！真的~

刷了牙就去了大光吃面包了，

清晨那冷冰冰一点都不带温暖的空气让人受不了。

下午就要回去学校重新登记过！

其实那天在新加坡就检查了我的成绩了，

ENL-C

MAT-D

Shit=.="我也有今天，算了呗！

我看打算重新enroll过的人应该不止我一个！

哈哈~还有Sheakee陪我，不错！老兵的训练不寂寞。

无奈马上就要投身战场般的激动，

什么可以让我化为武器？

月头了就算星期六妈咪也要独自开工算那几百个人的薪水！

没办法这就是打工的宿命。

没了她的早上还有点不习惯，

以前他总爱跑来叫我起床，打我的屁股，轻轻摸着我的头发说：Boy啊~起来了！

然后就全家人一起去吃早餐，天知道，那多么的温馨！

怀着希望的去到新加坡，

回到来家里发现其实我从哪里带来的，并没有很多，但那是经历，是回忆，磨灭不了！

这个世纪，似乎要20多30岁拥有辆bentley或者是rolls royce还是超跑级的Lambor还是ferrari!

才算成功。

可祖先留给我们有多少?

无奈人家从xxx开始赚钱。

我们就只可以从0开始赚xxx的钱！

少年不怕创业，尤其是在没负担，没担忧的条件下，我们更有资格挤上福伯斯，更有机会在华尔街成名。

多少个赫赫有名的亚洲华人出自于美国华尔街。

美国，2年后我是否踏上那片土地?

谁知道，问问我的努力！

踏上去的话我会不屑的说，那是我努力后的成果，你呢?

没有的话我会很冷酷的说，那就是我不努力，我认了！

以一个最学士，晋级华尔街，商业，你等着；福伯斯，你一定会有机会把我放上去的！

两年的时间答应自己，就只有这两年了，先苦后甘！其他的，别想，就这样！